Obstacle # 6: The challenge of my call to be a senior pastor.
As we started the church in 1990, we announced I would be the senior pastor and my husband would assist me. Some leaders talked behind my back and said it would never work. Others laughed and thought I was crazy.
Amazingly, I found some of the most vocal objectors to women being pastors are women. Just recently a lady approached me at a conference I was attending and asked forgiveness for judging me. Her opinion was that women could not pastor because they were too emotional. While sitting in a workshop taught by J. Lee Grady, editor of Charisma magazine and author of the book 10 Lies the Church Tells Women (Charisma House), God told her she was in error and must ask for forgiveness. I was shocked she felt that way, as she had never shown any negative behavior toward me.
Several months after I embarked in this senior pastor adventure, a man came in my office to say he loved the church, but he could not sit under a woman pastor. I asked him what he feared, and he became very unsettled. I felt the problem was not me as the female, but rather his acceptance of his being a man. Could I rob his manhood by being a woman in leadership over him? This was my question to him. Ultimately he decided to stay, and today that man is one of my main church leaders.
A few church members made comments about the need for a man to fill the pulpit. I heard things such as, "Bill has such a pastor's heart." I wondered what kind of heart they thought I had!
There was continual pressure to give up my position. Words have power over us, and eventually I began to entertain the suggestions. I just wanted to do God's best. I had started the church, but I began thinking maybe someone else should continue it. I actually began to believe a man could do this better and quietly implemented a search for a replacement, little by little convincing myself God wanted a man leading our congregation.
During this time of deluded thinking, an evangelist came to our church to minister. At one service the power of God was strong and people began to prostrate themselves on the floor. Feeling the leading of the Holy Spirit, I laid down directly behind our pulpit and immediately God spoke to me: "You have not treasured the pulpit I have given you. Who are you to give it to someone else?"
Instantly I realized gender was not an issue with God. Never again would I take lightly the divine purpose He had for my life.
Friday, March 28, 2008
Thursday, March 27, 2008
OVERCOMING the Obstacles to Women in Ministry
Obstacle # 5: The challenge of a unique lifestyle.
The lifestyle God had specifically called me to was the fifth hurdle I had to conquer. The Lord had called me to full-time ministry, but not my husband. Bill was a businessman who loved his secular job, and I loved the kingdom's work.
The two of us did not struggle with this, but we heard and felt the opinions of others. Some said if God calls the wife, He would certainly call the husband alongside. Others warned having different callings would divide our marriage. We were told God's order was for Bill to be the head of the ministry, and I was out of order in leading.
No one questions a male pastor whose wife works in the secular world. But people constantly come against a female pastor whose husband works in the business arena.
I spent the early years in our marriage supporting Bill's occupational changes and moves. I never complained and always yielded what I was doing to follow and assist him. However, when I turned forty years old, God clearly spoke to me to start a church -- through a vision of handwriting on a wall while I was in a Mexican restaurant. At the same time God spoke to my husband, who was in another state on business, telling him to "help Sharon start a church." God showed Bill a "movie" of our past with me encouraging him year after year. Now it was his turn to help me.
We were both surprised at God's command, but who were we to tell Him no? We knew this format was not the norm, but we had God's grace for our particular lifestyle assignments. At that time I found comfort in the book of Judges, where I read about Deborah, who became a leader with her husband in a supporting role.
The lifestyle God had specifically called me to was the fifth hurdle I had to conquer. The Lord had called me to full-time ministry, but not my husband. Bill was a businessman who loved his secular job, and I loved the kingdom's work.
The two of us did not struggle with this, but we heard and felt the opinions of others. Some said if God calls the wife, He would certainly call the husband alongside. Others warned having different callings would divide our marriage. We were told God's order was for Bill to be the head of the ministry, and I was out of order in leading.
No one questions a male pastor whose wife works in the secular world. But people constantly come against a female pastor whose husband works in the business arena.
I spent the early years in our marriage supporting Bill's occupational changes and moves. I never complained and always yielded what I was doing to follow and assist him. However, when I turned forty years old, God clearly spoke to me to start a church -- through a vision of handwriting on a wall while I was in a Mexican restaurant. At the same time God spoke to my husband, who was in another state on business, telling him to "help Sharon start a church." God showed Bill a "movie" of our past with me encouraging him year after year. Now it was his turn to help me.
We were both surprised at God's command, but who were we to tell Him no? We knew this format was not the norm, but we had God's grace for our particular lifestyle assignments. At that time I found comfort in the book of Judges, where I read about Deborah, who became a leader with her husband in a supporting role.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
OVERCOMING the Obstacles to Women in Ministry
Obstacle # 4: The church's system of titles and positions.
At one point I found myself in a supportive position of pastoring under male leadership. This man was kind and very good to me in many ways. However, he said he could not call me "assistant pastor" due to my gender. Instead he would call me a "pastoral assistant." I did not understand the difference, but he felt the distinction was necessary.
Years later I was still in the same conflict. Someone wanted to appoint me to a specific office of leadership but was struggling with my title. A decision was made to set me in the position with another man and call us "co-directors." We were the only co-directors in our fellowship in the nation, but evidently the leadership felt safer about this arrangement since I was a female.
The leaders in both these situations had no problem with my ministry calling, but both told me other people did. Supposedly these semantics games were the best ways to deal with church politics. Interestingly, when my co-director resigned his position, the leadership kept me as the only female director in the fellowship. God has a way of working things out on our behalf if we will trust Him.
Similarly, as I started attending pastors' conferences, I discovered the terminology used was "pastor and wife." While the women were sent to fashion shows and luncheons, the men were trained, equipped and feeding on the meat of the Word. I am not against fashion shows, but I went to those conferences to learn, grow and mature as a minister.
I needed help, someone to encourage my gifting and give correction if needed. I tried one conference after another looking for ministry support. Finally I realized the help was not out there for women ministers, so I developed Women's International Minister's Network (WIMN), a vehicle to train women for ministry.
At one point I found myself in a supportive position of pastoring under male leadership. This man was kind and very good to me in many ways. However, he said he could not call me "assistant pastor" due to my gender. Instead he would call me a "pastoral assistant." I did not understand the difference, but he felt the distinction was necessary.
Years later I was still in the same conflict. Someone wanted to appoint me to a specific office of leadership but was struggling with my title. A decision was made to set me in the position with another man and call us "co-directors." We were the only co-directors in our fellowship in the nation, but evidently the leadership felt safer about this arrangement since I was a female.
The leaders in both these situations had no problem with my ministry calling, but both told me other people did. Supposedly these semantics games were the best ways to deal with church politics. Interestingly, when my co-director resigned his position, the leadership kept me as the only female director in the fellowship. God has a way of working things out on our behalf if we will trust Him.
Similarly, as I started attending pastors' conferences, I discovered the terminology used was "pastor and wife." While the women were sent to fashion shows and luncheons, the men were trained, equipped and feeding on the meat of the Word. I am not against fashion shows, but I went to those conferences to learn, grow and mature as a minister.
I needed help, someone to encourage my gifting and give correction if needed. I tried one conference after another looking for ministry support. Finally I realized the help was not out there for women ministers, so I developed Women's International Minister's Network (WIMN), a vehicle to train women for ministry.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
WIMNUK Meeting - Please join us!
Birmingham WIMNUK Group | |
| Please come and join us! | |
|
Thursday, March 20, 2008
OVERCOMING the Obstacles to Women in Ministry
Obstacle # 3: The fear of man.
One day in the early 1970's, the Lord instructed me to call a citywide revival prayer meeting. This had never been done in my city, and I had no previous experience from which to draw.
Innocently I phoned local ministry leaders to come to my home to pray on a Friday night. They came, but one man in the group immediately challenged my right to direct the meeting. Since God never said I had to be in charge, I was not threatened. But when he suggested that only the men lead the prayer each night, I was quite disheartened.
Suddenly I found myself as a spokes-woman for all the females. Why couldn't we lead? What was wrong with a woman overseeing the prayer times? My simple obedience to do what God had asked brought me face to face with the gender issue in ministry.
Eventually the prayer times were divided among all present. Did God honor those prayer meetings? I don't know, but I did learn that responding to God's call and getting it done are not the same. I had no idea there would be controversy about a female leading a prayer meeting.
I also learned that revival cannot come to a community when leaders have their own agendas. As God worked on our hearts those days and nights, we prayed that walls would fall. We did not experience revival then, but we did learn that revival could not come without unity -- men and women alike.
One day in the early 1970's, the Lord instructed me to call a citywide revival prayer meeting. This had never been done in my city, and I had no previous experience from which to draw.
Innocently I phoned local ministry leaders to come to my home to pray on a Friday night. They came, but one man in the group immediately challenged my right to direct the meeting. Since God never said I had to be in charge, I was not threatened. But when he suggested that only the men lead the prayer each night, I was quite disheartened.
Suddenly I found myself as a spokes-woman for all the females. Why couldn't we lead? What was wrong with a woman overseeing the prayer times? My simple obedience to do what God had asked brought me face to face with the gender issue in ministry.
Eventually the prayer times were divided among all present. Did God honor those prayer meetings? I don't know, but I did learn that responding to God's call and getting it done are not the same. I had no idea there would be controversy about a female leading a prayer meeting.
I also learned that revival cannot come to a community when leaders have their own agendas. As God worked on our hearts those days and nights, we prayed that walls would fall. We did not experience revival then, but we did learn that revival could not come without unity -- men and women alike.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
OVERCOMING the Obstacles to Women in Ministry
Obstacle # 2: The idea that "women can be easily deceived."
This was another obstacle that surfaced as I desired to grow in my calling. As a female, I had no one to train me in ministry. Someone warned me to be careful because "women can be easily deceived." I became concerned that maybe I could get into error.
Yet day after day people came to my home for ministry, deliverance, healing and teaching. My prayer life grew, and many times I would pray all day long at home.
I asked the Holy Spirit about my lack of a mentor, and He led me to 1 John 2: 20-21, 27: "But you have an anointing from the Holy One, and you know all things. I have not written to you because you do not know the truth, but because you know it, and that no lie is of the truth...But the anointing which you have received from Him abides in you, and you do not need that anyone teach you; but as the same anointing teaches you concerning all things, and is true, and is not a lie, and just as it has taught you, you will abide in Him" (NKJV).
Wow! The Holy Spirit would be my Teacher and Trainer! The very next day the Holy Spirit led me to several books on prayer in a Christian bookstore. Through these books I realized He could equip me for ministry without a man's help. The Holy Spirit Himself kept me from error as I developed in my call.
This was another obstacle that surfaced as I desired to grow in my calling. As a female, I had no one to train me in ministry. Someone warned me to be careful because "women can be easily deceived." I became concerned that maybe I could get into error.
Yet day after day people came to my home for ministry, deliverance, healing and teaching. My prayer life grew, and many times I would pray all day long at home.
I asked the Holy Spirit about my lack of a mentor, and He led me to 1 John 2: 20-21, 27: "But you have an anointing from the Holy One, and you know all things. I have not written to you because you do not know the truth, but because you know it, and that no lie is of the truth...But the anointing which you have received from Him abides in you, and you do not need that anyone teach you; but as the same anointing teaches you concerning all things, and is true, and is not a lie, and just as it has taught you, you will abide in Him" (NKJV).
Wow! The Holy Spirit would be my Teacher and Trainer! The very next day the Holy Spirit led me to several books on prayer in a Christian bookstore. Through these books I realized He could equip me for ministry without a man's help. The Holy Spirit Himself kept me from error as I developed in my call.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
OVERCOMING the Obstacles to Women in Ministry
Obstacle # 1: The issue of submission
My first challenge revolved around the issue of submission. As a female leader, I was scrutinized extensively regarding my submissive nature. I had always thought of myself as a submissive person, but when ministry became my goal, submission became an issue I had to grapple with and fully understand.
As young believers, my husband Bill and I encountered well-meaning Christians who suggested we submit ourselves to their authority. Many felt Bill needed to keep me under his thumb.
I was starting prayer meetings, leading people to Christ, preaching and sharing the gospel all the time. According to them, this was a man's job. I was not sure what that meant. Jesus called us to disciple, to "go," but now I needed to ask my husband's permission?
Finally Bill told them we did not believe God wanted that arrangement. They had a fit! Being new to the ways of God, we really had to trust that we were hearing the Lord's voice. He taught us that submission was an attitude of the heart. The Lord began to speak to me about submitting to Him and to my husband. We could mutually trust and work as a unified team.
Submission WAS in my heart, and I needed to establish that I was a submitted person. But this did not mean others were free to run my life for me, or that a man must scrutinize all my decisions because he was "free of deception" and I was not. I spent years coming to the understanding that God sees submission as a willingness to serve Him. A love of mankind causes one to deny himself or herself for the good of others.
My first challenge revolved around the issue of submission. As a female leader, I was scrutinized extensively regarding my submissive nature. I had always thought of myself as a submissive person, but when ministry became my goal, submission became an issue I had to grapple with and fully understand.
As young believers, my husband Bill and I encountered well-meaning Christians who suggested we submit ourselves to their authority. Many felt Bill needed to keep me under his thumb.
I was starting prayer meetings, leading people to Christ, preaching and sharing the gospel all the time. According to them, this was a man's job. I was not sure what that meant. Jesus called us to disciple, to "go," but now I needed to ask my husband's permission?
Finally Bill told them we did not believe God wanted that arrangement. They had a fit! Being new to the ways of God, we really had to trust that we were hearing the Lord's voice. He taught us that submission was an attitude of the heart. The Lord began to speak to me about submitting to Him and to my husband. We could mutually trust and work as a unified team.
Submission WAS in my heart, and I needed to establish that I was a submitted person. But this did not mean others were free to run my life for me, or that a man must scrutinize all my decisions because he was "free of deception" and I was not. I spent years coming to the understanding that God sees submission as a willingness to serve Him. A love of mankind causes one to deny himself or herself for the good of others.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
OVERCOMING the Obstacles to Women in Ministry
Introduction -- Everyone who answers God's call to ministry will have obstacles to overcome, regardless of their gender. However, being a female in ministry does pose unique challenges. Looking back over my own ministry experiences, I realize there have been numerous hurdles along the way. Many were character-developing, faith-expanding, destiny-defining and definitely Christ-confirming.
As I share my challenges, I pray you will hear my heart and nothing else. I do not blame men, hate men, wish to be a man or desire a man's nature. I love being a woman! I enjoy my femininity and the opportunity to work with both men and women. My only prayer is to see women reach their full potential in God and align with Him in their destiny on earth.
Obstacles are barriers or restrictions that we run into along life's path. Some we just jump over, some we go around, some we knock down, and some take great energy to conquer. I look forward to sharing with you EIGHT of the obstacles I have faced as a woman minister!
As I share my challenges, I pray you will hear my heart and nothing else. I do not blame men, hate men, wish to be a man or desire a man's nature. I love being a woman! I enjoy my femininity and the opportunity to work with both men and women. My only prayer is to see women reach their full potential in God and align with Him in their destiny on earth.
Obstacles are barriers or restrictions that we run into along life's path. Some we just jump over, some we go around, some we knock down, and some take great energy to conquer. I look forward to sharing with you EIGHT of the obstacles I have faced as a woman minister!
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